Forget the Ingredients, just have a Peppermint Patty

A few nights ago, my husband and I were watching television, and an ancient commercial for peppermint patties came on. It's the kind of ad I've seen and forgotten a million times, but this time, a curious question struck me.

I turned to my husband, "What is inside a peppermint patty?"

Now, normally, my wonderful husband would respond to a food question in one of three ways:

a) Silence
b) Eye rolling
c) "You have no idea what the rest of the world eats outside of your healthy food bubble, do you?"

But NO! This question actually stumped him…

"I … umm… hmm… ummm"

Pause...

"Mintyness?"

Followed by,

"I don't know. What is that white substance in the middle?"

My husband, stumped with no witty comeback? This definitely merits an experiment and a blog entry.

Could we identify the ingredients in a peppermint patty from taste alone?


So, with dark shades and a big hat, I furtively went to buy some of the unhealthy, mysterious things. I didn't see anyone I knew, phew!

Although I promised myself I'd taste test one without reading the ingredients first, I did notice that the front said "As always, 70% less fat." Hmmm, so unless they mean 70% less fat than a 70% bigger peppermint patty, I guess it isn't all partially hydrogenated fat. Shoot, my first guess is out.

My husband answered the questionnaire first:

First Ingredient: Sugar
Number of ingredients: 28
Remaining ingredients:
Filler of gooeyness
Corn syrup
Chocolate - but not in the top four
Essence of peppermint

My turn:
First Ingredient: Sugar
Number of ingredients: 11
Remaining ingredients:
Chocolate
Soy lecithin
Corn starch
Partially hydrogenated vegetable oil
Invert sugar
Corn syrup
Artificial flavor
Natural flavor
Peppermint oil
Flour


The answer…
First Ingredient: Sugar
Number of ingredients: 13
Remaining ingredients, in order:
Corn syrup
Semi-Sweet Chocolate
-- Chocolate
-- Sugar
-- Cocoa
-- Milk fat
-- Cocoa Butter
-- Soy Lecithin
-- PGPR, Emulsifier
-- Vanillin, Artificial Flavor
Invert Sugar
Egg Whites
Oil of Peppermint
Milk

The Score:
First ingredient: me +1, husband +1
Number of ingredients: me +1, husband 0 (I was closer)
Correct ingredients: me +7, husband +4
Incorrect ingredients: me -4, husband -1
Originality: me 0, husband +1 (for "filler of gooeyness")

5 and 5!!! A tie.

What is the moral of this story? Filler of gooeyness is not as mysterious as one might think (basically, it's sugar), though it is pretty tasty.

By the way, in case you're wondering about the title, this entry is an homage to a fab girl with an addiction to peppermint patties who might be needing one this week. So, I'll say what I surely will never say again, forget the ingredients, just have a peppermint patty.

Disclaimer: dismissive statements expressed by aforementioned husband may have been slightly exaggerated for purposes of artistic expression.

Who the heck is Sandra Lee?

So I know it's been a while since I've posted. I've been having writer's block and ok, I guess I have no other excuse. I'm on a short trip to New York with my family for the holiday weekend. JetBlue actually isn't too bad: free DirectTV, most of which I watched without headphones. One Hit Wonders of the 80's on VH1 Classic, that takes me back. Ok, I'll confess that for most of that one, my husband loaned me his headphones. But before that I watched a show, soundless, on the Food Network, that I've never had the privilege of seeing before. I hope that it was the lack of sound, but I fear not. This may be the most revolting show I've ever seen:

Semi-Homemade Cooking with Sandra Lee

At first I didn't notice the "Semi" in front of the name, but as I watched her roll up slices of bologne and shove them into a pile of pre-washed, pre-cut iceburg lettuce, it began to dawn on me. The premise of the show seems to be to buy some packaged stuff at the supermarket, slightly rearrange it on a pretty mint colored platter (hopefully it matches your sweater as hers did) and serve it to your helpless guests. I looked for a link online to this innovative presentation of antipasti. Although, I couldn't find a link to the video, I did find the recipe, and on the way I found another masterpiece...

A summary... Buy chocolate frosting in a can, mix in some powdered sugar, dump spoonfuls of it on a plate, stick it in the fridge and serve this as, you guessed it, chocolate truffles. I'll bet you've never had truffles quite like these.

Must Stop ... Eating ... Thin Mints

Writer's block tonight. Bloated on Thin Mints and Sopranos reruns.

Man, those frickin Girl Scouts get you every time. I stopped buying the boxes years ago, but every year somebody gives me one as a gift. WHY WHY WHY can't I just throw it in the trash? Why do I even open it? Because once I open it, it's all over.

A very kind friend at work gave me a box of Thin Mints. I didn't even notice I'd opened the box, and suddenly I looked over and half a roll was gone. Half a roll? That's 280 calories. There is nothing thin about that. I feel so guilty, that's the size of a lunch.

I guess I'd be Ok doing it for the Girl Scout's - except that those cookies could kill me.

Look at all this crap:

• Partially hydrogenated palm kernel
• Soybean and Cottonseed TBHQ -Tert-BUTYLHYDROQUINONE, a preservative
• Invert Sugar - Invert sugar, a mixture of glucose (dextrose) and fructose produced from sugar (sucrose). This one doesn't seem too bad. It's basically sugar and water boiled together. Tastes sweeter and moister than sugar.
  
• Cornstarch - extracted from corn in a simple 13 step process
  
• Soy Lecithin

I'd like to understand what each of these things is, but ugh, it's just too confusing.

And can I ask? Wouldn't it possibly be a better experience to make and sell cookies from scratch, baked with natural ingredients? Now those I'd definitely order.

Oh well, I'm sure the guilt will pass in time for me to enjoy another box next year.